Title is a bit much so let me explain.
The world has all kinds of terrible things that the individual can do basically nothing about. Luckily, for most of us it has no direct impact and we are able to ignore the painful reality. But what if you were in a situation where it did impact you? In a way that is part of your everyday. What if for years you are struggling with the internal conflict of “there is nothing I can do about it” and “I can’t continue like this”?
As for the drugs, I specifically mean weed and specifically for the days where I find it too hard to ignore. I find myself thinking that if I get high I will have an easier time ignoring the pain and doing something good like cleaning or working.
Notes:
- Don’t bother with telling me that even the individual has the power to make great changes, I believe it and I’m doing my best, but I am also aware of the fact that this situation will not be changed in my lifetime probably.
- I’m not suicidal, I don’t harm myself and while I can tell that lately I have been using weed too much, I don’t think I am abusing it. I’m logging my usage and I review it weekly, If it get’s out of hand I will know (I think)
- I’m mostly asking about using external stimulation as a form of escapism
- Yes, I need therapy, sadly it is expensive. Yes I am looking for options.
Its not inherently a bad idea, but you need to keep in mind that is a crutch and not a cure. Substances won’t solve your problems, and shouldn’t be your sole, chosen treatment.
That said, just as crutches can help you survive and are often healthier overall than bedrest, so too can substances help. For example, if you have severe, chronic depression, and can’t afford medication, while weed won’t help (and may make it slightly worse overall), it might help you remain functional durring depressive episodes. Its no medication, but if its keeps you alive long enough to keep working towards a long-term solution, its worth it.
I realize that this is confirmation bias, but still, thank you.